I feel close to tears, I can’t concentrate, my writing isn’t up to scratch and people keep booking seemingly interminable prep calls into my diary. How will I ever write that other paper? And I am so TIRED of ‘feedback’. I don’t care anymore. Just getting dressed and showing up is barely all I can do. And I don’t have children or an underlying health condition or anything. Many others have more troubles than me–but I still feel completely bowled over. At least today. How can anyone want to be doing all this STUFF? Can’t we just stop? Made banana bread, sat in the sun looking at my tulips. Trying to be present and calm. But I just want to switch off the computer and sleep.